The Beastwood Files: September 2026

Just when I thought I’d return to some semblance of a normal schedule, my mother fell twice in the span of about 10 days and, amid a one-week stint in rehab, the family decided the time had ultimately come for her to move to assisted living. While she’s warming to the idea, her cat – who’s been alone in her old apartment for the better part of a month – isn’t quite ready yet, alternating between hiding in the closet and hissing at me when I try to say hello. Oh, and we need to move her for the second time in 18 months. This pic of my son with the playmat on top of his head pretty much sums up how I’ve been feeling at the end of these long days.

Stuff I Wrote

Things I Did

  • Drop down from the full marathon to the half marathon a month from now with no regrets
  • Wait until it was 40-something degrees at 8 a.m. to finally wear long pants to kindergarten dropoff
  • Regret the decision to switch to long pants when it was 80 degrees a couple days later
  • Not yet determine when the family will go apple picking this fall, which as everyone knows is a prerequisite for being allowed to live in New England
  • Not scold our cat for getting on the kitchen counter, since she turned 18 a month ago and frankly I’m more impressed that she can still jump that high than mad that she might get into something

Adventures in Fatherhood

  • Basement LEGO FTW. We were throwing a tantrum the other day because we wanted to peruse the selection of sets of small interchangeable plastic bricks at a local toy store we just happened to be parked one block away from. I managed to squelch the tantrum by remembering that I’d procured a sizable holiday LEGO set for myself in like 2023, subsequently left it in a bin in the basement, and delivering on my promise that said set would be cooler than anything we’d see in the store. Three-plus hours (and perhaps a delayed bedtime) later, we’d completed Holiday Main Street.
  • This summer, we established that Daddy’s grad thesis – a 170-page tome on Great Britain’s first, failed application to join the European Economic Community – is dreadfully boring. This summer, we also learned a song for preschool graduation that kicked off with the line, “We’re going up, up, up to kindergarten.” (It’s apparently sung to the tune of Something the Kids Are Into These Days.) Recently, we’ve put these things together in a delightful little song: “We’re going up, up, up to graduate school / Gonna write a thesis that nobody reads.” My wife even made up a dance.

Happy fall, happy Halloween, happy near-end to Daylight Savings Time, etc.


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